WOTD :::indifference:::

Today I found myself so fed up with something that I just didn't care anymore. I was willing to throw up my hands & just say "eff it." I was ready to just move on. And the word that came to mind about how I felt was "indifferent." But I knew I wasn't truly indifferent because I really did care despite what I was telling myself.

in·dif·fer·ent  adj.

1. Having no particular interest or concern

2. Having no marked feeling for or against

3. Not mattering one way or the other

Indifference is a dangerous state to be in. For any form of relationship, especially.

Whether it was positive or negative, you no longer have any sort of passion anymore for this something or someone.

Here are some quotes I've heard before on this topic...some heavy hitters...

"Forgiveness is indifference. Forgiveness is impossible while love lasts."
Mary Chesnut

• How often do we tell someone that we love that we have forgiven them? Deep down inside, however, you know you do not forget. And forgiveness is a process. A long process that never really comes to an end until you simply do not care anymore. As long as you love this person, you may keep tying references back to that incident you told them you forgave...even if you never actually tell them so. Overcoming these moments & not allowing the hurt in the past to boil over into the present is as close as we get to true forgiveness without having to be indifferent toward this person.

"Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike."
J. K. Rowling

"The most destructive criticism is indifference."Edgar Watson Howe

• Have you ever asked someone for their opinion and they've shot off nothing but negativity with no glimpse of constructiveness in sight? Have you ever asked someone for their opinion and they shrugged you off & said they did not even care? For many the latter would be more damaging. This person did not even dignify you with a response. I mentioned a lack of passion before. At least the negative criticism has some sort of fire behind it. It may not be what we want to hear, but the person cared enough to say something. You can even suggest that they add some constructive criticism since they have shown some interest. But if they don't care at all? This must be why feeling like you are being neglected and ignored hurts so much.

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference."
Elie Wiesel

• When you love someone, you make the effort to show them you care about them. You support them. Encourage them. You want to protect them. When you hate someone, you make the effort to show them you don't give a [expletive] about them. You shoot them down. You discourage them. You want to cause them harm. Either way, some form of effort is being made. The only difference is whether there are good or ill intentions. If you really want to show someone you do not care about them at all, give entirely no effort.

So this was one of my darker topics, but it has really been on my mind. This is why you must put in some amount of work to show that you want any kind of relationship to work. You can't just hang out and hope the other person just KNOWS how you feel without actually showing it. Your lack of action will be seen as neglect and your neglect will be seen as a sign of indifference.